Disclaimer: Don't own Batman. Don't own Monty Python. Didn't makes any money's. Author's Notes: Just be glad I didn't spoof the Spanish Inquisition or the Cheese Shop. However the Bruce sketch. . . . . *** Batty Python or Bat-Spam (A tribute to Monty Python) By The Seitz (no1swinger@hotmail.com) *** Tim: Morning Alfred Alfred: Good morning Master Tim Tim: Hi Bruce, hi Cass. Cass: Hi Tim Bruce: *Grunt* Tim: Why are there Vikings sitting at that table? Alfred: Don't ask Master Tim. Tim: Ok, you had breakfast yet Cass? Alfred: *At the same time as Cass* She has been waiting for you to arrive. Cass: *At the same time as Alfred* Not yet. Tim: Oh. Well then what can we have. Alfred: Well Sir, there's egg and bacon, egg sausage and bacon, egg and spam, egg bacon and spam, egg bacon, sausage and spam, spam bacon sausage and spam, spam egg spam spam bacon and spam, spam sausage spam spam spam Bacon spam tomato and spam, spam spam spam egg and spam, spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam and spam. Vikings: *singing* Spam spam spam spam spamdy spaaaam spamdy spaaaam... Alfred: My lobster servitor with cravats with a Braun sauce served in a brussel of sour manna with galots and overgenes garnished with a trestle Pattie brandy with a fried egg on top and Spam. Cass: Have breakfast with no spam? Alfred: Well Miss Cassandra there's the spam egg sausage and spam, that doesn't have much spam in it. Cass: No want any spam! Bruce: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage? Cass: Has spam! Tim: It hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, now has it? Alfred: Quite right young Sir. Cass: Alfred make me egg bacon spam and sausage with no spam? Vikings: *Softly, with increasing volume* Spam spam spam spam spam... Alfred: If I may say so Miss Cassandra. . .ick. Cass: What mean "ick?" No like spam! Vikings: *full out singing* SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAM! Alfred: Shut up. Vikings: SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAM! Tim: Shut up! Vikings: SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAM! Bruce: *With the Voice* SHUT UP! Vikings: *Quickly trailing off* Spam spam spam. . . Alfred: Bloody Vikings. Miss Cassandra, you can not have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam. Cass: NO LIKE SPAM! Tim: Calm down cass. I'll have you spam. I love it. I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam and spam. Vikings: SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAM! SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAMDY SP- Tim, Bruce Alfred: SHUT UP!!! Bruce: We're out of baked beans. Alfred: I'm sorry sir? Bruce: I was hungry after a patrol and you were asleep. So I ate the last of them. Alfred: You ate them cold Sir? Bruce: Should I not have? Alfred:*sighing* I'm sorry Master Tim, but apparently I'm out of baked beans. Tim: That's fine Alfred, just put spam on the plate where the baked beans would be instead okay? Alfred: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam and spam? Vikings: SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAAAAM! SPAMDY SPAAAM WONDERFUL SPAAAAM! SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM! SPAM SPAM SPAM! SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM! SPAM SPAM SPAM! SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM! SPAM SPAM SPAM! SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM! SPAM SPAM SPAM! SPAMDY SPAAAAAM! WONDERFUL SPAM! SPAMDY SPAAAAAM! WONDERFUL SPAM! LOVELY SPAAAAM! SPAAAAM SPAAAM SPAAAAAM SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMM! fin