Opening Lines
By Kerrie Smith (kerrie@subreality.com)

***
 
	Just... one... more... inch. 
	He stretched, fingertips straining, almost grasping his prize. 
	"Say it." 
	He whimpered, shoving his body against the gate. 
	"Say it." 
	His lip quivered, tears threatening to spill over. 
	"That's not gonna work on me and you know it. C'mon, bud." 
	A thin whine rose in his throat. 
	"Gaaaaaa-tor. Gaaaaaaaa-tor..." 
	"GAH!" 
	"Gaaaaaa-tor. Gaaaaa-tor. Say it, Bertie." 
	"GAHR!" 
	"Gaaaa-TOR. Gaaaa-TOR." 
	Bert Drake bit his lip, his two teeth indenting the pink flesh 
slightly.  Why did his big brother have to be so mean? And he kept 
making those stupid noises, when Bert was clearly asking for the return of 
his brave sidekick, Son of Krypton. 
	"Gaaaaa-TOR..." 
	"Son of Krypton!" Bert wailed. "SON OF KRYPTON!" 
	Tim's face lit up. "He said it! Cass, come in here, you gotta listen 
to this! He said it!" 
	Bert blinked. What was the big deal? Why wouldn't Tim give back 
Son of Krypton? 
	Cassandra Cain skidded into the playroom. "Bert say something?" 
	"SON OF KRYPTON!" Bert demanded. 
	"See, he said Gator!" Tim whooped. 
	Cassandra smiled. "I think he say, 'Give back Son of Krypton, 
stupid.' " 
	Tim chuckled, and passed Gator over the baby gate into the 
grateful hands of its owner. "Why do you always call that thing Son of 
Krypton? If Clark ever finds out about that, you're toast." 
	"Is his name. Ask Bert." 
	"SON OF KRYPTON!" Bert gleefully announced. 
	"Sounded like Gator to me," Tim grinned knowingly. 
	"You not listen hard enough," Cassandra replied. 
	Bert snuggled against Gator lovingly. Cassandra knew what was 
what. He looked up at the young woman. He wanted a Cass-hug. But how 
to get one? 
	"He's so smart, Cass! Already talking... I knew his first word was 
gonna be Gator. Dad swore it would be 'da-da,' but I know my Bert and..." 
	Bert cocked his head, and looked down at Gator again. Maybe all 
you had to do was make the sounds loud enough... 
	"--and walking already, I think pretty soon he'll be ready for--" 
	"BA'GIRL!" 
	Tim Drake froze in absolute horror. "Tell me you said that, Cass." 
	Cassandra beamed at the little boy who stood in his gated-off play 
area, arms stretched wide. "Bert know my name! Good boy, Bert!" She 
leaned over the gate, and swept him up in a big hug. 
	Bert smiled back. It had worked! This talking thing was worth 
something.  
	Then Son of Krypton announced that he wanted some affection, as 
well. 
	"GATOR!" 
	Cassandra grabbed Gator and gave him a friendly squeeze, then 
returned him. 
	Bert was so pleased with himself, he didn't know what to do. He 
stuffed Gator's tail in his mouth happily. 
	"Smart boy!" Cassandra praised. 
	"Cass, don't you realize what just happened?" Tim stuttered. 
	"Bert say my name. Guess he love me more than you," she teased. 
	"Cass, he *knows your secret identity.*" Tim's brow creased. 
"How on earth does he know your secret identity?" 
	"He see me in costume lots of times. You say, Bert just a baby, not 
know difference." 
	"I did say that, didn't I?" Tim sighed, gripping his head. "Well, we 
just have to teach him your real name." 
	"BA'GIRL!" 
	"That's right, smart boy!" Cassandra cooed. "Let's go get cookies." 
	"CASS!" 

*** 
 
	"Ba'girl! Gator! Ba'girl! Gator!" Bert sang merrily to himself, 
pleased with his new vocabulary, as he nibbled at his chocolate-chip 
cookie. 
	Tim paced the floor, pausing occasionally to take a swig from the 
bottle of Maalox he'd scrounged up. "How can we explain this? Well, if 
you're not around, maybe he won't say 'Batgirl' so much... Or maybe if we 
could teach him to say Cass... or Cassandra..." 
	"He say 'Gator' and 'Batgirl.' I think Cassandra a little much." 
	"Say 'Cass,' Bert," Tim said, leaning over Bert's high chair. "Cass?  
Cass?" 
	Bert blinked at his big brother. What did Tim want now? Cookie? 
He held out the soggy mass of former-dessert. 
	Tim groaned, gripping his forehead. 
	Bert frowned. Maybe Tim wanted a hug. He reached his arms out. 
	"'Gee, Dad, Bert said his first words today.' 'Yeah, son, what did he  
say?' 'Oh, the usual... Gator. Batgirl.' 'Tim, that makes no sense. Why 
would he say Batgirl?' 'Beats me, Dad, I guess he just watches too much  
tv..." 
	Bert waved his arms, and started to squeal deep in his throat. Then 
he remembered there was a new, easier way. 
	"WOBIN!" 
	Tim hit the floor. 
	Cassandra just giggled. 

*** 
 
	Bert nibbled on Gator's foot idly, from his comfortable position on  
Cassandra's lap. Big bro was up to something really strange this time. He  
was currently trying to wrestle Bert's mobile down from the ceiling. 
	"Got it!" he exclaimed, and promptly fell off the stool, tangling up 
in the mass of strings and wooden animals. 
	Bert clapped his hands happily, and Cassandra joined in. 
	"Very funny," Tim scowled. "Verrrrrry funny." 
	He sat down on the little footstool in front of Cassandra's rocking 
chair, and sorted out the mobile until he found the piece he wanted. 
	"Robin," he said slowly, holding up the cheerily painted wooden 
bird. 
	"Wobin!" Bert replied. 
	Tim pointed to himself. "Tim." 
	"Wobin!" 
	Tim held up the bird. "Robin." 
	"Wobin." 
	"Tim" 
	"Wobin?" 
	"Robin." 
	"Wobin." 
	"Tim." 
	"Bim." 
	"Tim." 
	"Tim!" 
	"That's right! Oh, good boy, Bert!" 
	Depositing Gator in Cassandra's lap, Bert crawled down to the 
floor, to reward his hardworking big brother with a drooly kiss on the 
cheek. Then he picked up the wooden robin from the floor, and held it up 
for approval.  
	"Tim!" 
	"Oh, nooo...." 

*** 
 
	"I can't believe I'm doing this..." Tim groaned, tugging at the 
sleeves of his uniform. "See, Bert?" 
	"Wobin!" Bert exclaimed cheerfully, running at his big brother's 
knees. 
	"Yes, Robin. See my cape? See my mask?" 
	Bert was busy stomping on Tim's boots, his tiny socks slipping on 
the leather. 
	"Bert?" 
	Bert looked up. 
	"Robin." 
	"Wobin." 
	Then Tim knelt down, and took off his mask, followed by the cape. 
Then he pulled an oversize sweatshirt over top of his costume. 
	Bert watched the whole procedure, fascinated. 
	Tim brushed his hair back into its usual neat style, instead of 
Robin's haphazard spikes. Finally, he put on his wire-framed glasses, 
carefully keeping them out of the way of grasping baby hands. 
	He regarded his little brother seriously. "Tim." 
	Bert looked confused. 
	Tim pointed to himself again. "TIM." 
	Suddenly, Bert's face lit, and he dashed off, as fast as his chubby 
legs could carry him. 
	Cassandra raised one eyebrow. Tim shrugged. 
	Then Bert returned from the nursery, dragging the heavy wooden 
mobile behind him. He stopped and brandished the robin triumphantly. 
	"Tim!" 
	"ARRRRGGGGHHHH!" 
 
***
 
	Bert watched in fascination as Cassandra wiggled her toes in the 
cool grass. His own shoes and socks were sitting on the porch next to her  
much-bigger ones. Cautiously, he stepped onto the lawn, and shouted 
happily at the wonderful feeling. 
	Cassandra grinned. 
	Careful to keep his feet on the wonderful grass, Bert sat down on 
the stoop next to Cassandra. 
	"COME BACK HERE, YOU STUPID BIRD!" 
	Bert carefully placed Gator on the grass, so he could feel the grass  
between his claws, too. 
	"ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!" 
	The Boy Wonder barreled across the back yard, waving his bo at a 
terrified robin, and hurling off batarangs left and right. 
	"You have silly brother, you know that?" Cassandra commented. 
	Bert picked up Gator and began chewing on his snout. 
	Cassandra leaned back against the warm wood of the porch.  
"Brother is Tim." 
	"Wobin." 
	"Sometimes. Robin when he's in the red suit. Tim when he's not." 
	"Tim?" Bert asked, confused. 
	Cassandra pointed. "Tim." 
	"Wobin." 
	"Robin is his secret identity. Can't call him Robin around Daddy-- 
Mommy and Daddy don't know." 
	Bert's eyes widened. 
	"Big secret. You keep big secret?" 
	Bert nodded emphatically. He pointed at his manic brother, was 
was now trying to climb a tree. "Tim." 
	"Yep. Tim crazy." 
	"Crazy!" 
	"Good word! Want to go chase Tim?" 
	"TIM!" 
	"Good boy." 

*** 
 
	Jack Drake walked in his front door, swinging his brief case, and 
whistling cheerily. 
	His two sons and Tim's secretary--er, roommate-- er, friend sat on 
the couch, watching Bert's favorite cinematic release: Toy Story. 
	"How are my boys?" Jack boomed, sweeping Bert up in his arms. 
	"Hey, Dad," Tim managed tiredly. 
	"Have you been running Tim ragged?" Jack teased, giving Bert a 
tickle.  
	Bert squealed in delight. 
	"Bert say first word today!" Cassandra announced. 
	Jack acted surprised, and bounced his son in the air. "You did? 
And what did you say, Bert Drake?" 
	Bert stared at him blankly. 
	"Was it... Dada?" 
	Bert looked blank. 
	"Was it... Mama?" 
	Bert blinked. 
	"Was it... " 
	Suddenly, Cassandra waved Son of Krypton into Bert's peripheral 
vision. 
	"Gator!" he exclaimed joyously. "Gator, Gator!" 
	"Wow!" Jack exclaimed. "What a smart boy! And who's got your 
Gator?" 
	"Ba'girl," Bert replied matter-of-factly. 
	All the blood drained from Tim's face, and he made a mad grab for 
his Maalox. 
	Jack chuckled. "That's right, Bertie. She's a *bad girl* to keep your  
Gator away from you like that." 
	Tim let out a huge breath, and slumped against the couch. 
	Cassandra smiled gently, and handed Gator to his master. 
"Cassandra," she informed him." 
	"Ba'girl," he corrected. 
	She gave him a Look. 
	"Cassassnanda." 
	"Can you say Dada, Bert? Da-da?" 
	"Tim!" 
	"He said Tim! Did you guys hear him?" 
	"GATOR!" 
	"Oh, you're such a smart boy!" 
	Tim scowled. "I can say Gator. Don't see everyone getting all 
excited about that." 
	He never saw the flying Gator until it hit him in the back of the 
head. 

*** 
 
The End